After eight months in Munich, I decided: Germans just don't laugh. We've watched funny movies together, we've heard jokes, we've seen police officers give tickets with their fly down: and nothing. Just me, sitting there, living up to the American Stereotype as the single person loudly cracking their head off. I've learned to adjust. If I find something funny, I usually just quietly giggle to myself. So when I went to the zoo, I wasn't expecting anything different.
I'm an Au Pair. I make less in a month than my boyfriend spends on the average weekend out. It's a little depressing. Luckily, as a native english speaker, there are many opportunities for me to make a little extra cash watching other people's children. One of which, is a nice half German half American family with two young boys.
I get a call early Tuesday morning that both the mother and the father were very sick, and asked if I could take the 2 year old the the zoo for a few hours so they could sleep. Now, I love this family, but the mother is a little bit overprotective to say the least. No judgement, just a statement of fact. When I arrived, she had a bag waiting for me with all the things I needed for the day. As I'm pulling things out, I get to the bottom of the bag, and low and behold-- a leash. Yes my friends, I was going to be one of those parents with their children on a leash. Thankfully, it was a nice one with a little monkey on the back (I'm trying to think positively). Internally, a part of me died a little bit, but I was happy thinking: It's okay. The Germans are very reserved and non nosey people. No one will say anything. I couldn't have been more wrong.
We start walking around the zoo. We're seeing zebras and giraffes-- the little boy was having a great time. I start to notice people pointing and whispering, but I kind of just figured they were looking at the animals. We enter the monkey exhibit. The boy and I walking around watching the monkeys, and we start to hear, "oh my gosh do you see that kid? what is he a dog?" I roll my eyes. I hear a little giggling--figure its nothing. The kid and I stand still because he sees some monkeys he really likes. We're looking and having a great time. One male monkey starts chasing a female monkey around the cage. A big crowd starts to form. The monkey then mounts the female monkey, and they start having monkey sex!! Everyone is pointing and laughing.. and so are we! I look around, to try to join in the fun, when I realize--no one is pointing at the monkeys.. they are pointing at me!! There we are, in the middle of watching monkey sex, and I am the laughing stock of the zoo. I was humiliated.
We left the exhibit and started walking to see something else. Then I really started to pick up on it. Kids were pointing and laughing--parents alike! Right in the middle of a giraffe pooping--people were laughing at us. It was terrible. I have never been so happy to leave the zoo in my entire life.
Lesson learned. I was wrong. Turns out, Germans do know how to laugh.
I'm an Au Pair. I make less in a month than my boyfriend spends on the average weekend out. It's a little depressing. Luckily, as a native english speaker, there are many opportunities for me to make a little extra cash watching other people's children. One of which, is a nice half German half American family with two young boys.
I get a call early Tuesday morning that both the mother and the father were very sick, and asked if I could take the 2 year old the the zoo for a few hours so they could sleep. Now, I love this family, but the mother is a little bit overprotective to say the least. No judgement, just a statement of fact. When I arrived, she had a bag waiting for me with all the things I needed for the day. As I'm pulling things out, I get to the bottom of the bag, and low and behold-- a leash. Yes my friends, I was going to be one of those parents with their children on a leash. Thankfully, it was a nice one with a little monkey on the back (I'm trying to think positively). Internally, a part of me died a little bit, but I was happy thinking: It's okay. The Germans are very reserved and non nosey people. No one will say anything. I couldn't have been more wrong.
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| Monkey leash |
We start walking around the zoo. We're seeing zebras and giraffes-- the little boy was having a great time. I start to notice people pointing and whispering, but I kind of just figured they were looking at the animals. We enter the monkey exhibit. The boy and I walking around watching the monkeys, and we start to hear, "oh my gosh do you see that kid? what is he a dog?" I roll my eyes. I hear a little giggling--figure its nothing. The kid and I stand still because he sees some monkeys he really likes. We're looking and having a great time. One male monkey starts chasing a female monkey around the cage. A big crowd starts to form. The monkey then mounts the female monkey, and they start having monkey sex!! Everyone is pointing and laughing.. and so are we! I look around, to try to join in the fun, when I realize--no one is pointing at the monkeys.. they are pointing at me!! There we are, in the middle of watching monkey sex, and I am the laughing stock of the zoo. I was humiliated.
We left the exhibit and started walking to see something else. Then I really started to pick up on it. Kids were pointing and laughing--parents alike! Right in the middle of a giraffe pooping--people were laughing at us. It was terrible. I have never been so happy to leave the zoo in my entire life.
Lesson learned. I was wrong. Turns out, Germans do know how to laugh.
Oh em gee. So funny! I wish you had a picture!
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